Punched out my wife

faller

faller

Well-known member
Trusted Member
This morning right after breakfast my wife gets all frisky so off to bed we went. We just finished up doing 69 with me on top and I start to move off her. Now we have a rule where if one of us is moving the other waits and then moves for obvious reasons. As I'm moving off her and start to turn around she has a brain fart and goes to a sitting position just as I'm turning and I nailed her in the mouth with my elbow so hard she literally passed out for a couple seconds. I hit her in the lower teeth area and ya there was plenty of blood.

The thing about my wife is she's a trooper, once the bleeding stopped she layed on her back, spread her legs and said "lets see if you can nail that as hard as you did my mouth". Damn I love that woman :love:
 
faller said:
This morning right after breakfast my wife gets all frisky so off to bed we went. We just finished up doing 69 with me on top and I start to move off her. Now we have a rule where if one of us is moving the other waits and then moves for obvious reasons. As I'm moving off her and start to turn around she has a brain fart and goes to a sitting position just as I'm turning and I nailed her in the mouth with my elbow so hard she literally passed out for a couple seconds. I hit her in the lower teeth area and ya there was plenty of blood.

The thing about my wife is she's a trooper, once the bleeding stopped she layed on her back, spread her legs and said "lets see if you can nail that as hard as you did my mouth". Damn I love that woman :love:
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your a lucky man to find such a lady :)
 
musclememory said:
WOW, I hope she is going to be ok
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Oh ya she's fine.

We have this little game with the number 69, when the phone battery is at 69% or the humidity is 69% or anything with that number we take screen shots and txt them to each other, just fun and games. Yesterday when we did that we both just broke out laughing thinking about the morning's events.
 
For some reason the title and story reminded me of the old Dr Swole stories. Glad shes ok


Here is a classic Dr Swole:

Fellas,

Last night, my ex finally convinced me to meet her ex-boyfriend of 3 years. They have been friends since high school, dated through college, and broke up in November but are still good friends. So I agree, if I can wear a wifebeater, I tell her. She obliged.

So we roll up to Richard's house. Holy f**k this guy was loaded. No wonder she dated him. I mean, I have my own place and a BMW but this cat must be swimming in dough. I didn't expect this but shook it off. Richard answers the door in a Donovan McNabb jersey, with what appeared to be 12" biceps peeking out. First he greeted Jen (my girl) and then he saw me. Though being a few inches taller than me, it was obvious from the first look that I intimidated the f**k out of Richard. How ya doin, Dick, I said, shaking his hand and feeling his bones crunch beneath my grip. He cried out in pain and invited us in.

Jen and Rich get to small talking. He's showing her pictures of the tsunami (he's with the red cross and helps with disaster relief - sleazy way to get pussy if you ask me), then they discuss the presidential debate and the Iraq elections. *Yawn* Finally while watching the super bowl, Rich mentions something about football players being huge, and how its no surprise since they are all juiced up? Jen mouths "No.." to me, but can already see I'm about to spout off.

Me: So you think a little juice makes you huge?
Rich: <nervous laugh> Well, it certainly helps out
Me: Lemme tell you something, Rich. You think if you incorporated some D-Bol into your Elliptical Cardio and Nautilus Machine you would be Ronnie Coleman?
Rich: What's D-Bol? Who's Ronnie--
Jen: Guys, guys please

From there, Rich decides to serve us Dinner or as I call it, CATABOLIC DELIGHT Are you kidding me? Some Middle Eastern Bread, smelly dip, and cous-cous?!?!?

Me: <staring at the table> What the f**k is this?
Rich: It's pita bread, hummous, and---
Me: No, I mean, WHAT THE F**K is this? <I'm fuming at this point>
Jen: <nervously> I THINK what he needs is some protein. He's big into bodybuilding and needs to get his protein intake in.
Rich: <nervous> Just go in the kitchen man? take... take whatever you want.

I rampage through Rich's cabinets, settling on a gallon of milk, peanut butter, and oatmeal. Rich watches in horror as I sit transfixed on his couch, shoving food down my throat and slugging my milk gallon.

after about 20 minutes... I break the silence..

Me: T.O. is a f**king warrior tonight, isn't he Rich?
Rich: Yeah. Look, I wanted to apologize about the food. I had no idea and I'll do anything to make it up to you.
Me: <mouthful of food> Anything?
Rich: Anything
Me: I want to armwrestle.
Rich: Armwrestle? <laughs> Come on, what are we, 10 years old?

Rich could see that I meant business though, and he came over to the table and rolled up his sleeves. I fought not to laugh at his 12 inch pipes. With my girlfriend screaming Please don't do this!? I slammed Rich's arm into the table as he started screaming OH GOD WHAT THE F**K DID YOU DO!?!?!?.

I'm done with this s**t, I said, grabbed my coat and Jen and said we need to get out of here. We can't leave him like this!,? Jen cried. SHUT THE F**K UP AND GET IN THE CAR I snarled and pushed her out the door, slamming it behind me.

I think it's safe to say Rich will be staying away from my girlfriend from now on.
 
You lucky as fuck , if that would ever happen to me, i think the would call the cops or keeps saying a beat them lol
 
WCL said:
For some reason the title and story reminded me of the old Dr Swole stories. Glad shes ok


Here is a classic Dr Swole:

Fellas,

Last night, my ex finally convinced me to meet her ex-boyfriend of 3 years. They have been friends since high school, dated through college, and broke up in November but are still good friends. So I agree, if I can wear a wifebeater, I tell her. She obliged.

So we roll up to Richard's house. Holy f**k this guy was loaded. No wonder she dated him. I mean, I have my own place and a BMW but this cat must be swimming in dough. I didn't expect this but shook it off. Richard answers the door in a Donovan McNabb jersey, with what appeared to be 12" biceps peeking out. First he greeted Jen (my girl) and then he saw me. Though being a few inches taller than me, it was obvious from the first look that I intimidated the f**k out of Richard. How ya doin, Dick, I said, shaking his hand and feeling his bones crunch beneath my grip. He cried out in pain and invited us in.

Jen and Rich get to small talking. He's showing her pictures of the tsunami (he's with the red cross and helps with disaster relief - sleazy way to get pussy if you ask me), then they discuss the presidential debate and the Iraq elections. *Yawn* Finally while watching the super bowl, Rich mentions something about football players being huge, and how its no surprise since they are all juiced up? Jen mouths "No.." to me, but can already see I'm about to spout off.

Me: So you think a little juice makes you huge?
Rich: <nervous laugh> Well, it certainly helps out
Me: Lemme tell you something, Rich. You think if you incorporated some D-Bol into your Elliptical Cardio and Nautilus Machine you would be Ronnie Coleman?
Rich: What's D-Bol? Who's Ronnie--
Jen: Guys, guys please

From there, Rich decides to serve us Dinner or as I call it, CATABOLIC DELIGHT Are you kidding me? Some Middle Eastern Bread, smelly dip, and cous-cous?!?!?

Me: <staring at the table> What the f**k is this?
Rich: It's pita bread, hummous, and---
Me: No, I mean, WHAT THE F**K is this? <I'm fuming at this point>
Jen: <nervously> I THINK what he needs is some protein. He's big into bodybuilding and needs to get his protein intake in.
Rich: <nervous> Just go in the kitchen man? take... take whatever you want.

I rampage through Rich's cabinets, settling on a gallon of milk, peanut butter, and oatmeal. Rich watches in horror as I sit transfixed on his couch, shoving food down my throat and slugging my milk gallon.

after about 20 minutes... I break the silence..

Me: T.O. is a f**king warrior tonight, isn't he Rich?
Rich: Yeah. Look, I wanted to apologize about the food. I had no idea and I'll do anything to make it up to you.
Me: <mouthful of food> Anything?
Rich: Anything
Me: I want to armwrestle.
Rich: Armwrestle? <laughs> Come on, what are we, 10 years old?

Rich could see that I meant business though, and he came over to the table and rolled up his sleeves. I fought not to laugh at his 12 inch pipes. With my girlfriend screaming Please don't do this!? I slammed Rich's arm into the table as he started screaming OH GOD WHAT THE F**K DID YOU DO!?!?!?.

I'm done with this s**t, I said, grabbed my coat and Jen and said we need to get out of here. We can't leave him like this!,? Jen cried. SHUT THE F**K UP AND GET IN THE CAR I snarled and pushed her out the door, slamming it behind me.

I think it's safe to say Rich will be staying away from my girlfriend from now on.
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Is this real?
 
Gotta be bullshit. It’s just some macho wannabes wet dreams or some trolls idea of what stereotypical bodybuilders are like. I just read the outback/sorority girl story. There’s no way it’s for real.
If it is real however. That guy has some serious low self esteem issues. Says the exbf was intimidated by him but everything he did in the story shows he was majorly threatened by the ex. Saying you’ll only go if you can wear a tank top?! That’s puffing out your chest like a gorilla does when it’s feeling threatened.
 
faller said:
Oh ya she's fine.

We have this little game with the number 69, when the phone battery is at 69% or the humidity is 69% or anything with that number we take screen shots and txt them to each other, just fun and games. Yesterday when we did that we both just broke out laughing thinking about the morning's events.
Click to expand...

Haha I guess me and my girl aren't the only ones that play that game with the number 69


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